My calling and purpose.

   

I thought midlife that having a family and kids and a probably very patient wife was what I wanted from my Father. It's always been my sincere desire to be a dad to kids and a husband to a loving wife. At 51 those days have passed me by like a runaway train. But that is okay. What was more important though was to really know and then fulfill the actual reason I was even born and have made it this far. Nowadays that answer is so clear that it has become my pillow at night. I was born to the service of others. To the most unlikely of those who expect such attention. For I was once such a fellow.

   My money is not mine. Nor is my time. There are times it does seem a burden, but that moment remains such a fleeting notion. What I have been called to do and be is not a decision that is solely mine to make. The value I have found in helping the lowly is a reward that is not even to be spoken of. It is such a private and personal ministry. It is absolutely my calling. There are not any stories I can tell, and there will not be any ribbons with my name upon them, but I am at My Father's service, and I am 100 percent rest assured blessed and beyond belief that someone like me was given such a beautiful purpose. It's like a big secret that exists in my life the thing me and My Father have going on. It's supposed to be that way. I live the most blessed underserved existence I could ever imagine. And it is all between, Him and I. To be able to help somebody besides myself.

  There was a time I was a taker. Yah is a heart changer. I believe that my life will be a living proof of this truth. I bet there are folks that breath their last breath without knowing what they are here for. I lived that way most of my life; aimless. Those days are behind me now, and it's a gift really to know what I am to do and why I am here. For this today, Father I am so very thankful. 

   I am a prodigal son. 

My Birthday

   There is a day that I think about every day. Every single day of my life since that day I always think about this. My turnaround point. February 23, 2014. That is the day I knew that God was personal and not corporate. It changed everything. It still does. Why a sinner like me? 

  Despite me having a Damascus moment, it has taken me such time to be molded in another's image. I still fail, but not as often. Nowadays I much more succeed. Today I want to take a moment and reflect on the patience of Yah. My gratitude extends beyond my reasoning. HIS love has always been exceedingly patient beyond expressing this. I think about the sin I was swimming in years ago when I knew not. Even then His patience was plenty.  I am so grateful now. God's patience is unexplainable. And merciful. It has a fruit bearing purpose. 

   I am now a very simple man. From a  complex and saturated world of everything He brought this man of nothing into something. To be somebody.... somebody small. Who would not be silent and Speak about Him, to the few people in my life that I engage that are also His. That's the purpose instilled within me and His ministry through me. I have no fear. Not to anyone. Not anymore.

  A willingness to be vocal and not silent in the space of sinners and a generation needing to be saved is a great venture. I honestly would not trade my small calling for any other one I could imagine. I feel like I am right where I need to be. Perhaps Yahweh is saving the last of the many through the least of His own. I cannot know His plans

  I can't wait till tomorrow though if that be His will. To see His plans unfold. To see His will be done top to bottom. I am a part of a grand plan despite my smallness. For this, I am on a daily basis thankful

 He loves people through people. 

  

The biggest leap of faith

 Turn off your tv. Get off the Internet. Press into His Word received from above. Trust the still small voice until it becomes a chorus into your soul as loud as can possibly be imagined. Do not trust any relationship not founded upon The Rock. There is a saving salvation, and it is called relationship. HE KNOWS YOU.

Know Him back. On your knees. In your prayers and thoughts. Every single moment know that your greatest cheerleader is also your leader. Your advocate. Your mouthpiece. He leads the way, knows the way and is the way. 

I grew up thinking Yah was up there just waiting for me to screw up. Nothing is further from the truth. HE has been holding my hand this entire time in this thing I call life. There is so much ugly he continues to make beautiful in and about me. I owe him EVERYTHING!

Obey. Submit. Repent. Repeat.

Turn off your tv. Unplug. Recharge. Trust that Holy Spirit that beckons you to His Greatness. It is so good. It is a big leap of faith to say to yourself that all you need is Jesus. If there is more let me know. I am loved and wanted and needed, right where I am today. For this knowledge I am thankful. 

These are the best days of my life.

Exodus

   

    I believe that our Father places thoughts within our hearts. It is the seed and seat of ones motivation. It is not much universal as it is personal. Every morning I read The Word. It's part of my typical day. There is not a day that passes during the week where before I leave my residence I open up The Good  Book that has exposed myself and read me back. I just finished the book of Acts and it was amazing to feel like I was there. The notion was placed upon me to next travel back to the beginning of it all. The book of Exodus. What a story it has been so far.

   I think about thusfar how a man called Moses  had the divine gift to hear from Yahweh, raised by the enemy until He was called to run from his youth into a wilderness and then return to be a salvation to his roots and heritage. I cannot imagine literally audiblly hearing from our Father, and then trying to bargain with Him over semantics. However, Yah understood the man. The purpose and objectives of our Father shall be done. We are ideally powerless, without His power. He was willing to choose someone who needed someone to speak for him. Is that not what we are? Spokesman...

  It brings me a level of comfort to know that Yahweh has not hardened my heart. I have not chosen to listen in as much as He has brought me up to a point where I want and need to hear. I long to hang up on His word. It is a real thing how God chooses things and places and instances in our life where we become humble enough to hear. And to want to do that.

  I was such a stubborn child. Rebellious from birth. I am today very grateful for every difficult place and things I have experienced that has brought me to a place where I long to listen. I'm not proud of myself. I am thankful for God's amazing love. 

   

Take courage

  Goshen, Ohio 2021

    We know how His story ends, for we too are aware and awake to how this all began and why. Life on Earth that is. In my experience that life is much more spiritual than I'd ever imagined. To acknowledge His Spiritual leading is undeniable. It changes everything. A great work our Father does is replacing our fear with His faith. It will make a believer do insane things in Jesus name, for we become courageous. Willing to defend. Able. Ready.

  The turmoil going on in this world is applicable to the spiritual, for war has broken out, not on Earth, but in Heaven. There are physical manifestations to spiritual reality. Our Creator has been challenged. The reason for life is being hijacked by a lie, and this is the spiritual reach and reason of this adversary. Satan is not omnipresent. His Antichrist spirit is alive and well in the highest reaches of every not from God institution. The division has begun, and even godless humans see this. There is a sense or feeling to most that things are changing somehow. Someway.

That is a spiritual thing manifest in a physical world. I am witnessing our Father move mountains today and it doesn't surprise me. That's what He said He would do.

 

  

The gift

 

The things in life that drive us into a corner of fear; these develop courage. The root of faith is acknowledging you once did not believe.  Nobody has ever done anything to deserve to be alive. It's a gift. It's miraculous. 

  That's why faith is a gift. We can develop the courage to be a believer in Jesus, but the reason for that courage is not fully realized until the gift of faith is bestowed upon an unworthy soul. It comes from above. We deserve neither faith nor mercy. Yahweh sent Yeshua to remove the vail that the Law was. The Tutor was fully revealed at Pentecost when faith went from our works to His revealing. It became spiritual. It remains the same.

  The movement of Yah is not gonna be an internet based experience. It's resides apart from natural law. He has Always known us. It becomes the moment and following change that results when we know that HE...has known us all along. 

  I'm not worthy. I am willing. 

The Truth

I was raised in a Jehovah's Witness home. It was what defined my life back then. Being a Jehovah's Witness. I was ashamed of that at times, embarrassed even, no Holidays and being pulled out of school every time those days and times came around; knocking on doors on a Saturday morning in neighborhoods that my peers dwelt in. It made me callous to the adversity that came with that belief. However, I was certain that my folks and by proxy me, were the only ones that had the truth. It was many times worth the struggle and contempt, because when Armageddon came, I would be proved true. All of us Witnesses would. I felt sorry for those that didn't take my Watchtower and Awake magazines. Looking back, I had never been lower, and never more asleep.

  Faith is a gift. That's what the Bible says. Grace, this too is a gift. So is knowing God personally. Just ask Peter. He never believed that Jesus was Messiah until Yahweh personally told him. Look It up for yourself. Faith and belief is not a birthright. It's not a physical knock on your front door. It's spiritual and exists outside ANY religion. It changes your heart and therefore it changes everything else about you. It's not a religion you have to belong to. It is a relationship you are invited into. On February 23, 2014, I accepted that invite. How could I not!!! His voice inside my being surpassed every belief I ever believed that up till then. I can no longer be silent about this. 

It turned out to be a relationship. I was so wrong.  I knocked on 1 million doors and heard no! He knocked on my door and yes was the only answer I could muster. It's been the same ever since.

  I am no longer tossed about the waves of the sea we live upon. I have always had a Rock. If this world ended today, I am not afraid. I KNOW HE KNOWS ME, and that for me is enough. It always will be. For relationship will always trump any religion. You cannot unknow this. JESUS is the Way and The Truth and The Life and no man can saw asunder this reality. I cannot deny Him. I can deny everything else in my life but that. That's what The Truth does. It exposes every lie, therefore conforming you to truth. I am so grateful, and very very unworthy of this. Like I'm on a watchtower, I am now awake. So are many like me. I am not special. 

  I am now shunned and distanced from most of my immediate family. It's not really a big deal to me because of that knocking on my door that I answered trumps decades of indoctrination and deception. One second in Yahweh's presence exposes everything right from left. I now pray for them. It's not a choice I made, it's one they made when one trusts man over God. Period.

 It's not thier fault though. Like Jehovah said; faith was a gift, and that faith is only through His Son. We are no longer a slave to religion, but a servant unto our Messiah Savior Redeemer Rescuer Truth Love Life Way and eternal salvation always. God's word in Jesus. No scripture says otherwise.

'...I came to divide Father against Son, mother against daughter...'  Jesus said that. Not Jehovah. 'You will be witnesses of me..." Jesus said that too. Whose voice will we hear that will awaken all alseep in death, commanding us to rise? Who has now all authority over all things? Why should ALL honor the Father as they do the Son? I am quoting scripture here. Who has the name above all names? Who is going to Judge you? Whose kingdom is to come? Who died for you and yet lives? 

Religion is the hands of earth reaching into the heavens. Relationship is the hands of God, reaching out to you.